Well I've officially called off the house hunting. I've spent the last two weeks frantically searching my town for a house that will accomodate eight people comfortably. The market right now is horrible. Every single house, in our price range, was awful. The house either needed tons of work or was in a bad location. And let me tell you, we weren't looking to be cheap either.
That however, is not the reason for stopping. I was all willing to relocate to another town. I even had started looking in nearby communities. The problem, surprise, surprise, is the in-laws. I understand that they have very big decisions to make. I get that. It's just that my MIL and SIL don't seem to want to actually COME to any decisions.
They don't have much time, I've told you all of the condition of the house. Winter is approaching, they need to move. We've given them a few options, they need to pick one. They can't seem to and forget trying to help them. They seem to think we all are against them in everything we suggest. It's frustrating.
I know that their lives are chaotic right now. But they also don't understand that we were willing to turn our lives upside down too to help them out. My kids were even willing to move away from their friends. Nobody seemed to understand that by at least giving us an answer on whether or not we were going to move in together.
So, I decided to stop driving myself and my kids batty and let them do what they have to. I just hope they can come to some sort of a decision before it gets cold.
Showing posts with label House hunting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label House hunting. Show all posts
Monday, August 27, 2007
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Am I Coming Or Am I Going?
That my dear friends, remains the mystery. As you can see, I have been AWOL for almost 5 days. I've been walking in circles for those lost days. The Schmitty house is in a whirlwind. It's been crazy, to say the least, and my head is swimming. I'm probably making you all dizzy right now just reading this post. I'm not making sense, am I? See? I told you. So again, the question as of now is, "Am I coming or am I going?"
I have no freaking idea!
So, bloggy friends, go pee, grab a drink, and buckle down - this is probably going to be a long one.
Mr. Schmitty grew up in the house his mother still resides in. It is a fairly large, very old home. When my father-in-law passed we tried talking her into moving to something smaller. The house has needed an upgrade for years and though my sister-in-law and Mr. Schmitty's 97 year old Nana live there as well, they really don't need a house of that size.
My mother-in-law refused to move. She did not want to move from the home she raised her children in. She is very sentimental and stubborn, there would be no changing her mind, no matter how hard we all tried. We told her the house was in desperate need of being repaired and wasn't a good place for her to be. She didn't care, she wasn't budging.
Finally we got her to listen to us and at least let my other sister-in-law's father come by. He is an engineer and we wanted him to look at the foundation. Well, it's a good thing he did. The foundation was built with red brick. In one area, two layers of that red brick has disintegrated into dust. The house is crumbling. She now has no choice, she needs to get out. A contractor confirmed the problem and told us she really should move before the winter comes and sell the property.
My mother-in-law began visiting condos and homes in adult communities. She wants something with three bedrooms to accommodate them. There is not much out there.
I then thought to myself and approached Mr. Schmitty. I asked him how he feel about selling our home and hers and buying a larger home together. My thoughts were this; his mother is 73 years old and is beginning to show signs of getting older. I refuse to someday put her in a retirement home. She's been through too much and done too much for others for her family to do that. Not that I'm saying they would. I do think it's fair to say, however, that she would probably move in with us. My sister-in-law is handicapped, and though she is fairly independent, I do not believe she can live alone either. I concluded that instead of moving everyone again if his mother should fall ill, or God forbid pass away, why not do it now and let her enjoy the rest of her life a little? Nothing makes her happier than her grandchildren. She'd be able to spend so much time with them. I could help her with Nana. She wouldn't feel afraid when my sister-in-law goes out. My sister-in-law could go out more and not feel guilty. I could do the cleaning and the shopping, which for them is difficult. I would have some adult company when Mr. Schmitty is working evenings. I think the pros outweigh the cons.
Do I know that this is a huge undertaking? Yes. Do I know that we will lose some privacy? Yes. Do I know that I will not always get along with them? OH BOY YES! But it would be for the best.
Now, we need to find a house. We've been looking and everything in our price range seems to be not quite large enough. Or if it's the right size, it's not in the best shape. It's been frustrating, to say the least. I'm anxious and frazzled.
I would like to stay in town so W. can stay in the school system but it may not be a reality. We may have to start looking in another town.
My eyes are crossing now. My head hurts. I need to take a Motrin or two...or maybe three. I'll keep you all updated. Please wish us luck that we can pull this off. And now, if I were you, I'd hold on to my chair because the Schmitty whirlwind is taking off like a tornado!
Toto, Toto!!
I have no freaking idea!
So, bloggy friends, go pee, grab a drink, and buckle down - this is probably going to be a long one.
Mr. Schmitty grew up in the house his mother still resides in. It is a fairly large, very old home. When my father-in-law passed we tried talking her into moving to something smaller. The house has needed an upgrade for years and though my sister-in-law and Mr. Schmitty's 97 year old Nana live there as well, they really don't need a house of that size.
My mother-in-law refused to move. She did not want to move from the home she raised her children in. She is very sentimental and stubborn, there would be no changing her mind, no matter how hard we all tried. We told her the house was in desperate need of being repaired and wasn't a good place for her to be. She didn't care, she wasn't budging.
Finally we got her to listen to us and at least let my other sister-in-law's father come by. He is an engineer and we wanted him to look at the foundation. Well, it's a good thing he did. The foundation was built with red brick. In one area, two layers of that red brick has disintegrated into dust. The house is crumbling. She now has no choice, she needs to get out. A contractor confirmed the problem and told us she really should move before the winter comes and sell the property.
My mother-in-law began visiting condos and homes in adult communities. She wants something with three bedrooms to accommodate them. There is not much out there.
I then thought to myself and approached Mr. Schmitty. I asked him how he feel about selling our home and hers and buying a larger home together. My thoughts were this; his mother is 73 years old and is beginning to show signs of getting older. I refuse to someday put her in a retirement home. She's been through too much and done too much for others for her family to do that. Not that I'm saying they would. I do think it's fair to say, however, that she would probably move in with us. My sister-in-law is handicapped, and though she is fairly independent, I do not believe she can live alone either. I concluded that instead of moving everyone again if his mother should fall ill, or God forbid pass away, why not do it now and let her enjoy the rest of her life a little? Nothing makes her happier than her grandchildren. She'd be able to spend so much time with them. I could help her with Nana. She wouldn't feel afraid when my sister-in-law goes out. My sister-in-law could go out more and not feel guilty. I could do the cleaning and the shopping, which for them is difficult. I would have some adult company when Mr. Schmitty is working evenings. I think the pros outweigh the cons.
Do I know that this is a huge undertaking? Yes. Do I know that we will lose some privacy? Yes. Do I know that I will not always get along with them? OH BOY YES! But it would be for the best.
Now, we need to find a house. We've been looking and everything in our price range seems to be not quite large enough. Or if it's the right size, it's not in the best shape. It's been frustrating, to say the least. I'm anxious and frazzled.
I would like to stay in town so W. can stay in the school system but it may not be a reality. We may have to start looking in another town.
My eyes are crossing now. My head hurts. I need to take a Motrin or two...or maybe three. I'll keep you all updated. Please wish us luck that we can pull this off. And now, if I were you, I'd hold on to my chair because the Schmitty whirlwind is taking off like a tornado!
Toto, Toto!!
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