I'm No David Copperfield

I am the world's WORST magician but when you have an audience that is only 3 and 4 years old, it's amazing what you can pull over on them. I was using a toy coin T. had and was making it "appear" magically from behind their ears. Now mind you, my hands are definitely not quicker than the eye. But I seriously think I could have pulled an elephant from their ears and they still would have looked at me wide-eyed like I was the most extraordinary human on the planet. Isn't it the best when they truly believe mom knows all and can do all?

T. and R. are at the age that they think I can DO all. I'm Wonder Woman to them. W. on the other hand, much to his chagrin, wonders how I KNOW all. Last week he had standardized testing at school. His teacher called me because he apparently had a little problem getting started. That's not a good thing when you are taking a timed test. He kept putting his head down on the desk and it took about ten minutes for him to snap out of it. She didn't want me to let on that she had called but she asked if I could talk to him about the test. She wanted me to reassure him that it was important but not to stress about it. We discussed it over dinner that night. When I asked him if he put his head down he exclaims, "How do you always know what I do?" Those of you who know me, already know, I'm not letting this one go without freaking him out, just a bit. "Mommy knows EVERYTHING you do", I answered. "I know, but how?" he says while rolling his eyes. "When you were born I was given a crystal ball, I see all, so you better keep in line." I went back to eating my dinner while he just stared at me.

So back to yesterday. I was showing W. a card trick, the smart boy picked it up in seconds. I gotta tell you though, if he asks me one more time to pick a card, I may scream. T. was trying his hand at his own version of a card trick. He held out cards to me like this:


"Pick a card mommy!"

I pick one and he tells me to put it back. All the while watching my every move. He folds the cards up, turns them over, and shuffles through the deck until he finds my card. "Is this it?" he asks with a toothy grin. "No, it's not", I say, because I have to mess with his mind too. It's only fair. He frowns. "Just kidding, yes it is." Big toothy grin is back. I know, I know, I'm mean.

R. had to finally get into the act. I really don't know what she was trying to do. I just know it was with cards falling all over and she shouts, "ALA CA DAMN!"